Banned for denture-itis.... the inability to take a nice big bite out of a juicy round apple.  You try, but when you remove the apple from your mouth, there they embarrassingly are.... your dentures firmly lodged in it.

banned for mocking my poor dental hygiene

Banned for not using bubblegum to make your dentures fit more firmly.

Banned for in-dentured bubblegum.

Banned for feeding termites to a person with wooden dentures.

banned for giving the termies wood

Banned for biting termites with a spit instead of a swallow.

Banned for giving the silverware a spit n' polish.... with emphasis on the spit.

Also banned for putting termites in your ex-girlftiend's boyfriend's pants.... hoping they'd go for the wood.

Banned for eerie cuisine.

Banned for lean cuisine and telling Jack Spratt's wife to eff off if she wanted chew the fat a little.

Banned for buffet grazing with the dung beetles.

Banned for rolling in poo.

Hey I'm a dog thats what dogs doo.

Banned for dog play interference.

Banned for chasing passing autos.

auto banned

Banned for going on the autobahn and doing only 40kmph while everyone else is doing a respectable speed to save bottling up the roadway

Banned for thinking I was going slow, 40kmph is a nice click for a tractor.

banned for singing on said tractor

Banned for slow speeding on the road to the briar patch. 

Banned for high speeding to the briar patch and blowing the tortoise and the hare off the road

Banned for hogging the inroads.

Banned for hogging and getting thorny in the Ban patch.

banned for throwing mama from the train

Banned for that wasn't mama.... it was your mother-in-law.

Banned for whistlers instead of hooters.