The Movies of 2005 Will Kick My Ass

Ruby Red!!!!!

from JoeUser Forums
Mr. Pignon. Mr. Pignon!!! AH HA! AH HA!

Now that that's out of the way, (cue the Jo Schmo Tape) I have been recently informed that Fuckin Nick Cage, The Family Man himself, is set to play Ghost Rider. (PLAY) What is going on? I also have found out that there will be a sequel to The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, simpled titled LXG2. Let's eXaggerate for Giggles 2. There will also be "Jurassic Park IV: The Lost Audience." I hear the title is still being reworked.

I do want to see "Oh, What A Lovely Tea Party," and there are about another 5 movies that might balance out the fuckin Nick Cage crap.

Oh and I can't wait for the Garfield movie to come out. It would be a nice follow-up to hitting myself in the head with a Nerf bat. Foam free. Oh that's right. I said it.
18,424 views 8 replies
Reply #1 from JoeUser Forums Top
Just noticed the trend? There were 3 rocky sequels 3 jaws sequels 3 aliens sequels in fact if a movie makes enough money they will make a sequel. I am suprised they didn't make titanic 2.
Reply #2 from JoeUser Forums Top
sorry this reply was by accident
Offworld Trading Company
Reply #3 from JoeUser Forums Top
Whats wrong with Nick Cage?  I think he's a GREAT actor.   Leaving Las Vegas and Adaptation are two really good ones, but he has others too.  Sure, he has a couple of corny movies, but most actors do.
Reply #5 from JoeUser Forums Top
And theres about to be ANOTHER rocky sequal....sad but true.
Reply #6 from JoeUser Forums Top
I know there are many sequels. But at least their sequels of movies that WERE GOOD!!

I think you missed the point of why I feared for these movies. If you want to make a sequel to a good flick, go ahead, but why would you continue the agony of LXG.

As for Nick Cage, I have no problem with his acting ability. Adaptation was an excellent movie, and he even made The Rock into something more than a simple action flick. His acting ability, however, has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that Cage looks nothing like Clark Kent. Cage also has mannerisms that transcend each character. He tends to slur, and do a wave of yelling when he gets angry. The Superman of the comics was a good looking dude, and Cage kind of has a pair of bug eyes. He's also balding a little, and has a very thin frame. Superman has the tall, built profile. I just think that Hollywood could have come up with a better choice.

If you think that another Rocky sequel is depressing, last year I heard that there will be another Rambo movie, where Stallone travels to the Mideast in search of.......Osama. I hope to god Variety was wrong.
Reply #7 from JoeUser Forums Top
The ONLY reason they haven't (I repeat haven't, because some day there probably will be) is because they were stupid enough to make the ship sink in the first movie, and then have the girl get old and die. If they hadn't done that, they would have made a sequel by now, and I'm sure they're all kicking themselves. But I'm sure, with the movie world as it is these days, a whale is going to swallow that necklace, and then a seal is going to find it in its' shit, and he's going to take it back to his wife seal, and then a nature person who likes to watch seals because she's a lonely loser will find it and then she will wear it to a fancy ball and prince charming will fall in love with her because of the pretty blue necklace except he's really in debt and he wants the necklace to pay his way out, but then she's tipped off by his best friend who is a lowly pauper and then they fall in love and it turns out the lowly pauper is really a KING in a different land, which is better than a prince, and then they get married and live happily ever after.

I'm pretty sure that will be airing on Disney.

~Anne.
Reply #8 from JoeUser Forums Top
Shit I forgot to say the only reason they haven't made a SEQUEL TO TITANIC.

Or better yet they might make a prequel... But my powers of mind-reading and seeing in to the future are waning, so I can't tell you what the "plot" to that would be, at least not yet.

Sorry :(

~Anne (again)