Banned for thinking that thunkin' is a figment of an inane desire to understand that which is incomprehensible to a deluded mind, doesn't know squat. So there. Ha!

Banned for going down to the tool shed to see if you could find a bigger tool.... and while you were there you did.

Banned for getting disillusioned after going to Total Tools and finding out their tools are bigger than yours.

Banned for getting stuck in the middle of it all.

banned for messing with the nuts and berries

Banned 'cause the Nutcracker isn't too far away. 

Banned for being so close that you could poke that short lady in the back with both hands behind your head

Banned for not everybody is like you.... wanting to give the blue-veined hooligan freedom to breathe in the great outdoors.

Banned for seeking the time on a miniature of the town hall clock and thinking it's 1am because it let out a big dong.

Actually, it's 1.10am here right now.

Banned for thou shalt not bring into question the time it is when I say it is that time.... cos I'm here and you're not.

Also banned for not living within the sound of Bow Bells... which on a fine day or any other, is the baby brother of Big Ben.

Banned for getting your frills in ways other than whistles and bells... and deriving your thrills from Sweet Charlotte the Harlot's big bells while heartily blowing her whistle for all it's worth

Banned for throwing in the teapot without ingredients.